so i ask this really super amazing local musician if i could use her song for that movie i want to make. shes not sure, and i feel bad cuz i asked her right out of the blue. it was like "hey im weird can i use your song?" it was mighty awkward....

so tonight i was supposed to meet a bunch of ppl and hang out at OU (Organic Underground) and what did they do? they changed the time to two hours earlier than when i showed up. i swear the peps at the cafe were freakin! they probably thought i was gonna rape someone or something, so i bought a latte just to not look creepy. i still did. *face palm*

so its remembrance day. and we went down to the gym for a twenty minuet thing. like really? twenty minuets? those people saved out bacon and all we can do is give them twenty minuets?!?! gawd, like these are sons, daughters, mothers, fathers, friends brothers, sisters. they had lives, they could have had children who will never get to know them. a lot were only in their twenty's, we will never get to know the greatly awesome people they may have become. and all we can do is give them twenty minuets? my school system is seriously messed up!


man every time i see that pic up there i feel sad. i mean think about it. think of all the people who still talk about him, think about him. how can he rest in peace? i mean he didn't even die in a good way. Naked on his bed from an overdose, is that really the way anyone wants to go? especially the naked part, i mean how awkward?!

anyway, thats all i got for now. but for now...whatever....

k so i have noticed that every time i look at that picture i get this kind of chill. its weird, like a wave of sadness and regret. i know i shouldn't feel sad because hes no longer in pain, but i would have loved to meet him. what ever i dont want to talk about it because when i do i get all sad and stuff.

but so i think i like this guy in the ninth grade. i think i have said this but we were hanging out at DQ and he was across the street and i was watching him, and he was so interesting. and there was this really long period of silence and it wasn't awkward. it was really kool. i mean he is really kool too. i love alot about him, like the fact that he really likes Bob Dylan too, and that his brother is really kool, well until he told their mom that i did my guy friend in the bathroom(WHICH I DIDN'T!!!) and that i did heroin. i don't, but you know he is such a kool kid, its really weird. i don't know.

but on an upper note my guy friend left school. ya so it was like one day he just said, oh well i dont want to be here. so he's not. and im kinda pissed about this! i mean he was gonna be really kool, and we were gonna bereally good friends, and everything! i miss him. i mean i really really really liked hime. like really! and now he's gone. my life sucks.

so i was looking through my gr nine year book, and i was thinking of all the friends that have left me or are going to leave me. its kinda long:
Ryan
Kate
Matt
Jaret
Johnny
Dan(OMG i miss dan!!!)
Krssy
Colten(maybe)
Meatloaf(maybe)
and for ome reason me and Jeaninne arn't as close anymore. im not to sure what happened there. but ya. and so now im feeling all lonely, and depressed and shit. BLAH!!

the only thing that can keep me from you is one word, Stop...

k so meatloaf has been buggin me to post, so here it is, so piss off now meatloaf! so today i went to that loyalist thing. it was loads of fun. so this guy, he was part of the 91X radio his name is Ty. i think thats how you spell it, but what ever if its not. he was really cute, but totally hilarious! i went back to his booth and asked if i could have three pins for a few friends he said "ya sure put your bag on the table" we got these bags from someone, i cant remember now, and so Ty took like three hand fulls of pins and dumped them into my bag, and i couldn't tell him to stop because i was laughing so hard. it was really funny!

so i scared the crap out of the guy i like today. he was walking down the hall and i "tasered" him, he was also listening to music so he didnt hear me callin him, or running down the hall after him. he turned around really fast and says, "OMG you
scared the living fuck outta me! your lucky i didn't elbow you in the teeth!!!" i laughed(slightly afraid...) and said that i would laugh, he raised his eye brow and said "ya after you wake up and have to eat through a straw...." i had no idea what to say to that so i just laughed a little. i felt like a dork.

today i was going to addition for a part in the sakespear play the school was doing, but the teacher doing the addition wasn't there to do it, so me Kate and Amanda wen to the library and then to a cafe. it was fun we each shared three peices of cake, it was soooooo good!!! omg it was amazing!!