k so i have noticed that every time i look at that picture i get this kind of chill. its weird, like a wave of sadness and regret. i know i shouldn't feel sad because hes no longer in pain, but i would have loved to meet him. what ever i dont want to talk about it because when i do i get all sad and stuff.

but so i think i like this guy in the ninth grade. i think i have said this but we were hanging out at DQ and he was across the street and i was watching him, and he was so interesting. and there was this really long period of silence and it wasn't awkward. it was really kool. i mean he is really kool too. i love alot about him, like the fact that he really likes Bob Dylan too, and that his brother is really kool, well until he told their mom that i did my guy friend in the bathroom(WHICH I DIDN'T!!!) and that i did heroin. i don't, but you know he is such a kool kid, its really weird. i don't know.

but on an upper note my guy friend left school. ya so it was like one day he just said, oh well i dont want to be here. so he's not. and im kinda pissed about this! i mean he was gonna be really kool, and we were gonna bereally good friends, and everything! i miss him. i mean i really really really liked hime. like really! and now he's gone. my life sucks.

so i was looking through my gr nine year book, and i was thinking of all the friends that have left me or are going to leave me. its kinda long:
Ryan
Kate
Matt
Jaret
Johnny
Dan(OMG i miss dan!!!)
Krssy
Colten(maybe)
Meatloaf(maybe)
and for ome reason me and Jeaninne arn't as close anymore. im not to sure what happened there. but ya. and so now im feeling all lonely, and depressed and shit. BLAH!!